What follows are my entries to Ben Schott’s Limerick contest in this weekend’s NY Times. He gives bonus marks for those using any of the following words:
Birthers · Darwin · Surge · Olympian · Swine Flu · Clunker · Gubernatorial · Stimulus · iPhone · Madoff · Google · Blackmail · Uranium · Irony · People’s Republic of China · Extradition · Congress · Wikipedia · Euthanasia
My entries:
The Birthers would have us believe
Obama, when he was conceived
His mom was in Kenya
With such an agenda
She took more than nine months to leave
The People’s Republic of China
Why can’t it be gentl-ah and kind-ah?
Chairman Mao was a brute
He gave not a hoot
How many were sent to the grind-ah
Schott’s Vocab Is Splendid Because
He wants us to make no faux paux
“Use ‘Darwin’ and ’surge’
But don’t get the urge
To send me an x-rated clause”
What a con man was Bernie Madoff
As with people’s money he made off
Now he sits in a cell
And if he behaves well
He will still not get any time off
As Polanski fights extradition
He appears to show no contrition
He’s a dirty old man
Who’s been on the lam
Who decent would back his position?
An attempt to blackmail Dave Letterman
Was made by a man named Joe Halderman
Joe needed the money
Knew one of Dave’s “honeys”
So which of the two is the better man?
Obama as Icarus
To help make his hometown Oh-lym-pian
Obama did fly to Co-pin-hagin
He flew too near the sun
‘Twas Rio who won
Now he’s lost his wings, too bad for him!
